People often speak of long weekends as “relaxing.” But if you have little kids, you know that they are often anything but!
In this week’s episode of Best of Both Worlds, Sarah and I provide a guide for surviving and possibly enjoying long weekends (like Labor Day weekend coming up soon). From making plans (and getting out of the house) to trading off, to having something to look forward to, there are lots of ways to make the most of this time, and maybe even have some fun too.
Please give the episode a listen! In the Q&A we address the topic of whether to get a minivan when kid #3 is on the way.
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Yes, that makes sense, Ms. Laura Vanderkam
I wonder what age you will refer to as “little kids” though, Ms. Laura Vanderkam. Or if you refer to anyone who cannot be left alone unattended for 2 hours as a “little kid”. I also wonder if this episode is applicable to anyone who is not caring for little kids right now.
P.S.: The website that I added to my name for this comment this time is actually the main site of a company where I used to work but do not work today.
@Yukun – I think there’s a lot to be said for planning a long weekend even if someone doesn’t have little kids! It’s always good to have an anchor event, and plan for something fun you’re looking forward to. There might just be a little more relaxation — which is a good thing.
Yes, I’d think so too, Ms. Laura Vanderkam. Since Dr. Sarah Hart-Unger gave an example of a 2-year-old whom we consider as a “little kid”, and you asked Dr. Sarah Hart-Unger “At what age were they reasonably entertained by screens”, where she found out from her example to be “About 2 and a half”, while you also mentioned that you were all going to Cape Cod, Massachusetts when someone in your household was about 3 and a half and find it hard to keep him entertained on that trip, and you did the same trip about a year later – maybe 13 months later – and it was fine – that he can focus on screens for hours in the car – within reasons, I’d presume that you refer to those who are less than 4-and-a-half years old or anyone under the age of 18 who cannot be left unattended for a couple of hours as “little kids”.
I do think that there’s a lot to be said for planning for 3 consecutive days of not going to work. In fact, in some sense, I cannot afford not planning for – or failing to execute my plans of – these 3 days in September – or any one of these sets of 3 consecutive days of not going to work. Or more accurately, it is essential for me to spend these 3 days mindfully and get as many things that I normally say I don’t have time to do as possible to be, well, done. If I fail to do that, then that is basically proof that I cannot function very well without having structures in my days, and that is a pretty disturbing consequence – but I know I don’t have to let that happen for this September. Now, this anchor event during this 3-day-break will be something out of the ordinary, which will go together with Method #6 of the Tranquility-by-Tuesday methods, “One Big Adventure, One Little Adventure”. I do have plenty of out-of-ordinary things that I haven’t done yet that can be done, so I surely can make one of them the anchor event for this 3-day-break.
In the meantime, though, Ms. Laura Vanderkam, I was wondering if you really meant to express in the podcast that if I am not caring for little kids right now, then me not expressing how pleased I am for having these 3 consecutive days of not going to work is me showing respect for those who do need to care for little kids during these same 3 days, and that I have earned the qualifications to plan something fun for myself only if I’m caring for little kids or have cared for little kids. My aforementioned anchor event is meant to fulfill my relationship goals and my personal goals, and it is meant to be something out of the ordinary, but I did not plan this event for fun.
Finally, my colleague actually does have 2 daughters and 1 son whose ages range from 5 to 8, so he could’ve made use of this episode. And yes, he does have a minivan, but I’m not sure if his initial intention for obtaining this minivan has to do with him having 2 daughters and 1 son. That is, we also use this minivan for work purposes in our company all the time. So, yeah, that’s that one.
What worked for us when I had a “little” kid (age 1.5-5 let’s say) was to plan a morning activity out of the house (e.g., gymnastics class, swim lesson, local museum, playground, nature area) come home, eat lunch, then kid naps or chills once nap is dropped while parents relax. Then at around 3-4 wake up, get ready to go to dinner, and then go to one of several kid friendly restaurants in the area by 5ish to beat the rush of childless people. Play at nearby playground. Come home and get ready for bed. Child lights out at 8, parents by 8:30. Fin.
@Sesb – ooh, that sounds good. I used to take the kids to a local diner to fill time in the evening. It was a risky strategy as multiple little ones can get chaotic but it did mean I didn’t have to cook and we were out of the house for a while.
Lol yet another reason having one child rules.
Great episode Laura! Lots of great tips. Our kids are younger (7/3.5) and even just having an outside activity in our backyard at 4 after screens is helpful (snack platter and bubbles/ball game etc)- helps reset. Bonus if the weathers nice and I can have a beer and relax out there too.
I really appreciate this topic and suggestions. Thank you!
I used to take our kids to Ikea just for entertainment. They had free babysitting, lots of toys and stuff you could test, and the kids meals were a great deal.