October reflections + content round-up

I tend to plan my life in weeks and in seasons (at least in terms of my seasonal fun lists). But there are other units of time, and in recent years I’ve been trying to do something of a monthly reflection + looking forward to the arc of the next month.

It’s the last day of October — something not lost on any parents gearing up for tonight I am sure — and this has been quite a month. The beginning of October feels like a very long time ago. I think that’s because a lot has happened. Nothing huge like a major vacation — I was only away from home two nights — but there were lots of medium-sized adventures.

I pulled out my time logs to jog my memory about a few highlights. Among them:

Seeing my college kid twice! He came home the first weekend of October, and then we went up to see him in Boston the last weekend of October. He’s doing quite well academically and has gotten involved in a few activities that tap into his (current) pre-med interests.

Experiencing lots of music. I sang in a performance of Victoria’s Requiem + the Howells Requiem in early October, and went to a concert of the Byrd Ensemble singing Palestrina out in NJ another day. I sang in a trio for a service and now we’re learning Christmas carols in one ensemble and practicing All Saints music in another. My 5-year-old started singing in the “Junior Choristers” at church. Another child did a successful jazz band audition and the 5-year-old has also started piano.

Enjoying fall color. We are definitely in peak fall color right now, which makes even driving to get a kid at school feel sort of magical. But I also did a few things to see more leaves, like go visit my brother in upstate NY, which involved hiking in Minnewaska. I went to Chanticleer (the garden), and ran on several trails around here multiple times.

Biking by the beach. I’d wanted to do this for a while, and finally did! It was a beautiful fall day and I got to sit by the ocean for a while too.

Managing kid stuff. There were playdates, hosting a birthday sleepover, and Boo at the Zoo. Two kids went on overnight camping trips in October (albeit not with me). I have also enjoyed spending some time with my 16-year-old while he is getting his driving hours in. You can’t bury yourself in your phone and earbuds if you are driving.

Going in the hot tub at night. The pool and hot tub are closed now but I had pushed that forward to October 22, so most of the month it was a possibility. Well, the hot tub. The pool was cold, though I went in briefly at the beginning of the month and some of my braver kids spent more time in there. We had some issues with the pool in late August into mid-September, but that got fixed and at least we got to enjoy the end of the season. It’s fun to be outside in hot water on a cool night, looking up at an October moon.

Having random adventures. For instance, I went on a buggy ride while visiting my brother. I visited the aquarium and the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston.

Writing (and other content creation). Ok, yes I worked some too. Some highlights: Big Time has a cover! (And I guess is available for pre-order at the major retailers; it will be out May 5.) I started doing my own version of NaNoWriMo — a little early because why not? I outlined a novel in October and am 4 days into doing 1700 words a day. It is not all fully fleshed out but I learn things by writing. I also wrote some autumn-themed sonnets. In terms of other content creation, my guest list for October at Before Breakfast was just amazing: Oliver Burkeman, Jenny Marrs, Paul Leonardi, and Charles Duhigg. If you want smart insights on ways to spend your time…there’s some listening right there!

(I also saved the BOBW Weekends episode to listen to on the treadmill yesterday and I was not disappointed. Yes, I heard it when I recorded it but I am also 100 percent the target market, so I still enjoyed it.)

Anyway, this week’s Before Breakfast shorter episodes included the tip that “Conversation breeds conversation.” Just as I learn what a novel is about by writing it, the more you talk with someone, the more you have things to talk about. I also had an episode called “Is it for now or forever?” When something feels unsustainable, it’s important to ask whether it’s just for a season or if it’s the new normal. If it’s just for a while, we can shoulder through a lot. But if it’s forever then we need to build new processes with the new truth in mind.

Over at Vanderhacks, my Substack newsletter, I wrote that we should “Just get to three.” Many good habits do not need to happen daily, and aiming to do something three times a week is often more feasible. I wrote that we should “Get to know your neighbors,” and trick-or-treating offers an excellent excuse. Behind the paywall I wrote “What I loved about NaNoWriMo.” Thanks for supporting me and my work!