In a recent Patreon gathering (come join us! The next meeting is Wednesday October 26th!), Sarah and the crew pulled together lots of great tips for family meetings.
Meetings get a bad rep, but they do, ideally, serve a purpose — bringing people together at a set time to reach decisions that can’t be made individually. We tend to have too many meetings for work, and probably too few for home!
Now in my mind, “family meeting” meant everyone — like toddlers included — but the general gist from the Patreon crew was that a family meeting means the adults, with possibly older kids brought in for sub-committee stuff. In the first part of this week’s Best of Both Worlds podcast, Sarah shares tips for effective family meetings that help everyone stay on the same page.
Then we launch into the second half of our mailbag (we answered career questions last week). We tackle multiple topics including how to stay close to far-flung relatives and how to manage holidays between different sides of the family, tips for managing late sports and early bedtimes, helping kids navigate change, and advice for over-committed adults.
Please give the episode a listen! And please leave us a rating/review wherever you listen to podcasts. On Apple podcasts, you can just go to the show page on your phone, and scroll down past the recent episodes, and under the “Hosts & Guests” bit. There you’ll find a section called “Ratings & Reviews.” You can quickly tap to rate (5 stars, please?) in 2 seconds, or if you have 2 minutes, you can scroll down a little farther past the highlighted review to the little link that says “Write a Review.” Short is totally fine — just say something you like and if you’d recommend us to new listeners.
Thank you so much for considering it! A large number of reviews not only helps new listeners find us, it helps convince potential guests that we are worth their time. That helps us bring you great guests in the future!
I think “family meeting” is a confusing title. I also assumed it meant the whole family! Our lives aren’t complex enough to require a regular meeting. I am kind of the boss of the house and do most of the planning/scheduling. My husband and I do meet quarterly for a “financial review.” But that’s the extent of a family meeting. I could see it being something we need to do when the boys are older and have more activities.
Splitting the holidays can be really difficult. The way we split the holidays is definitely not equal but my parents are understanding. I am 1 of 5 and typically 2 of my siblings are with my parents for most holidays. My MIL is a widow and my husband is her only living child. So we always spend Christmas with her so she is not alone. The other holidays are split more evenly, but traveling with young kids is not very pleasant (our toddler has screamed for 2 of the 3.5 hour drive!!) and then sleeping arrangement are challenging. My MIL is local so we sleep in our own beds when we celebrate holidays with her which I much prefer. Overall, we prefer to be home and to have quieter holidays in general so the split we’ve come up with works on multiple fronts. My parents probably don’t love that we never spend Christmas with them, but I’ve been hoping we could celebrate Christmas at a different time. That’s what will happen this year as my boys will be with them for the 3rd week of the month while we are in Mexico and then we’ll do an early Christmas when we come to get them. I do get a little sad thinking of a time when our boys won’t be celebrating Christmas with them, but I envision us being willing to come to them for holidays whereas my parents prefer to stay home since a couple of siblings are generally there for Christmas.
I love our family meeting and had never thought about involving the kids before, but maybe that’s because they are 2 and 4 I’m not sure what they would add to our well agenda’d meeting. I’m surprised more people don’t have family logistics meetings, but I can also see there’s a bit of an instant turn-off factor at the idea of a home planning meeting. I think ours arose from selfishness on my part – I didn’t want to be the Operations Manager of my work and of my home, so I needed to delegate or I would get annoyed. It works well for us (for now!)
It’s so funny, I always thought a family meeting included my slightly older toddlers as well and was really confused how other families got their toddlers to provide valuable insight. Ha!