Possibilities

I put on my fall fun list that I wanted to go to Cape May to see the autumn colors on the shore. Cape May is also a great bird watching destination as various species stop by on the way south. I actually had something of a work-related reason to go; my potential time management fable will be set on the autumnal Jersey shore (per the proposal) and so I wanted to see the scenery for inspiration. I wanted to write down the names of trees, birds, etc.

Still, I dithered about going. It's always easier not to drive two hours each way. I have a lot of other stuff going on, but I managed to clear today of everything. I had no other day in the next two weeks that would work. So today it was.

The colors were beautiful. I'm not sure it came out so well in my pictures, but even the drive across New Jersey on the Atlantic City Expressway, and the Garden State Parkway, was gorgeous. Bright reds, yellows, oranges. The cloudy sky making the colors brighter. The mottled vines, the old wood fences. The sound of the sea. The caw of birds. I ran a big loop through the Nature Conservancy's land, and into the Cape May Point State Park, with its light house.

In theory with self-employment, I have total control of my time. In practice, I tend to tie myself to my desk. A lot. There's always something else I could be doing. I have to remind myself that time is a choice and each day is a possibility. I need to write, but I need to see the world I write about too. Sometimes I have to run down these paths to see where they take me.

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  • I so understand the chains of self-employment. I feel guilty whenever I break out and do something fun. Last week we went to Indian Cave State Park in Nebraska to see the fall colors. We went on a weekday so even though the colors were great, the people were few. It was fabulous! Getting outside in nature is such a cleansing thing for me. It is always so worth it. I should do it more.

    • @Tana - exactly. I am probably the toughest boss I could ever possibly have (I'm not like that for people who've worked for me - I think/hope! But for myself.) Now is the time to be outside. So gorgeous.

  • For whatever it's worth... I work in a corporate environment and I feel guilty anytime I take a vacation day, especially for more random reasons (vs family events, "big" vacations and holidays). I think we can find all kinds of ways to guilt ourselves like that!

  • It's hard to remember that sometimes the work of writing doesn't happen at the desk -- great that you made yourself go! I wish I wasn't chained to my desk right now (I guess that's why I'm reading your blog :) ).

  • Funny - I felt "guilty" reading for another reason. Years ago I dated a guy who had a home in Cape May. LOVED our time away. Running on the beaches, riding bikes everywhere, etc. Once winter came, i realized I loved Cape May more than him... ha ha!

    • @Camille- ooh, intriguing! I recall the line in that song Strawberry Wine: "Is it really him or the loss of my innocence I've been missing so much?" Hard to separate the person from the place/time/phase of life :)